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8th-Nov-2012 08:19 pm
Becc_j Art
Consisting of incoherent squeeee because... DAMN!




Can I just...

LAKDGHLAK SF;ASDKJHAOIRH;KJASDFJHASIOJ!!!!!! HOLY FUCK!!! THAT WAS FUCKING.... AMAZING!! I CAN'T EVEN GET MY FEELS TOGETHER BECAUSE I HAVE NEVER BEEN SO PENT UP AND EXCITED AND HURT AND....ALSKDFH AS;LIDFASOIFMN!!!! FUCK!

Ok.

*deep breath*

That was an episode that I wished I had watched with fangirls because I needed to CLING and SQUEE and say THAT! THAT IS MY SHOW!

I am putting a disclaimer on this reaction/review post because I am not going to analyse the ins and outs of whether Dean is right or if Sam is right or if either of them are out of character. I DON'T CARE! Seriously! They are both right. They are both wrong. They are both stupid and ridiculous and BEAUTIFUL in their utter utter love for each other. THEY ARE A MESS!! (me too actually!).

AND I LOVE THEM FOR IT!

God dammit! That was some fine writing. Humour and angst all rolled into one ball!

I loved how damn OBVIOUS it was that it was going to end with one of them being possessed and vomiting HOW THEY ACTUALLY FEEL! The fact that it was so CLEAR made me SO nervous. I desperately wanted it to be Dean AND IT WAS! (I was completely and utterly unspoiled for this ep. I hope the promo didn't give too much away). This MotW made me SO EXCITED!

I could sprout for hours about Dean's motivations for what he's feeling and why and Sam's etc. There's a friggin' TON of dissecting to do after that one and I seriously hope fandom explores IT ALL! (but.. oh god... Dean is SO SO hurt and messed up and NEEDY and Sam stood up for himself and had a life outside of Dean but actually HE DIDN'T!... arghhhhh)

THOSE BOYS! The jealously of each other's "other" is astounding. Seriously!? How many times did Sam mention Benny?! IT'S MESSED UP! (and I love it!). Damn but these two have ISSUES!

Aside from ALL THAT the thing I love MORE THAN ANYTHING is that the show is still all about THEM. It remembered ALL THAT STUFF from the past. (I know it SHOULD, but for it to actually do that was nothing short of fabulous!). As soon as Sam mentioned Amy I was like... holy crap. They are tying in past story lines. THANK YOU!

Also.

I LOVE GARTH TO PIECES! What a fabulously quirky, grounded, smart and charming character. (I NEED to vid that guy!) I have a crush I'm sure!

Also, what an amazing way to "remember" Bobby. \o/ He didn't just belong to Sam and Dean. *sniff* And DJ Quail's performance was top notch. He never trivialised Garth. And how awesome to actually have a hunter who isn't full of despair.

That episode felt like part of the whole Supernatural universe. It remembered past characters and story arcs. It tapped into the angst of the brothers, it used the MotW to explore their issues, it had a supporting character that had his own agenda but also provided levity. It was one for die hard watchers like me - the ones who live these PURE brother episodes.

I have to stop now. I HAVE SO MANY FEELS! Seriously. I cried (again!). I cried because the show went there. It gave us dialogue and angst and HURTY FEELS and the brothers being so caught up in each other that it's CRAZY. I adore that they are fighting like this because it means they are still on that journey to find some sort of peace. And with at least one more (if not two) seasons to go that journey is going to be long.

I fucking LOVED that episode! (If you hadn't guessed!) I might try and be a little more critical later (I think I still want more from Sam's back story and the flash back transitions were jarring) but for the time being I am THRILLED that Adam Glass sat down and wrote an episode that was all about the UST love between my boys.


*happy hurty contented sigh*

(and now I need an angry, desperate, needy, loving wincesty fic to calm my feels *g*)




ETA: I just have to repeat (after seeing some responses)... THESE BOYS ARE MESSED UP! Why would what they say and do make sense?! They are human and therefore FLAWED! They don't make sense yet because THAT'S THE WHOLE POINT! WE know that. They have yet to learn that! Sam is OBVIOUSLY feeling guilty about his response to not looking for Dean and he's trying to DEAL with that and Dean is OBVIOUSLY still carrying some deep seated acceptance issues. And as much as we say "we've already been there" I DON'T CARE! I don't think any of these issues have been fully resolved so I'm more than happy to dig them up again gouge them out with a nail file. As long as it's about their messed up co-dependence I'm cool. (You do know I watch this on a level that isn't rational or objective yeah? Ok. We're cool then *g*)
Comments 
8th-Nov-2012 12:28 pm (UTC)

Yuuup. I feel pretty much the exact same way after this one. :)
8th-Nov-2012 12:37 pm (UTC)
\o/
8th-Nov-2012 12:35 pm (UTC)
tehe, I was just gonna make an entry asking what`s with the radio silence when it comes with the latest ep, and here you are, posting about it ;D

once again I have to say: THIS!

so much, I love the episode, because of everything you`re wrote. There are bits and pieces that left me go *huh* while watching, but that could be because of my, kind of twisted, view of certain things.

I have to disagree on one point, and that`s Garth. I`ve suffered from a Garth overload. I don´t really like him, and I wish he`d stay gone. But I guess that`s just me, feel free to ignore.

I can`t wait to see where they take the show, what they are going to make with the mess that`s the brother`s relationship.

btw, if you happen to run into the "angry, desperate, needy, loving wincesty fic" could you send it my way? ;D
8th-Nov-2012 12:50 pm (UTC)
Hey!

What?! There's radio silence?! Noooooooo. I have to delve deeper but there's gotta be squee surely!?!

I think what I love about Garth is just how different he is to Sam and Dean and any other hunters. Also... and mainly this... he seems to be there in his own right. As in, he seems more realistic and less caricatured (unlike Becky). I mean, he is "unrealistic" in the TV realm but I don't feel like he's being played purely for laughs.

He's only been in 3 eps (or 4?) so I'm not feeling the overload yet, but I can appreciate that some might be.

And OF COURSE! If I come across any ep tags that involve them sorting out their damn differences in bed I'll tell you! :D (god dammmit! I want both of them fighting for dominance and both losing because they are so equal it's not funny...*g*)

8th-Nov-2012 01:13 pm (UTC)
They are both right. They are both wrong. They are both stupid and ridiculous and BEAUTIFUL in their utter utter love for each other. THEY ARE A MESS!!

Ha, yes. I've seen both reactions around (Sam is evil! No Dean is evil!), and I just have to laugh. No, they're really not. They're doing that thing where they fall into complete nervous collapse if they're away from each other for longer than it takes to buy coffee or interview a witness. You can't expect them to make sense at this point. It'll take another four or five episodes before they calm down enough to talk without fistfights or weeping. It's adorable that they still do that.

I loved how damn OBVIOUS it was that it was going to end with one of them being possessed and vomiting HOW THEY ACTUALLY FEEL! The fact that it was so CLEAR made me SO nervous. I desperately wanted it to be Dean AND IT WAS! (I was completely and utterly unspoiled for this ep. I hope the promo didn't give too much away).

At this point, whenever someone says 'the monster makes you act on your feelings', I half expect them to say 'Bye! Have fun killing it! We'll be in a bar three states over! Don't call us!' But they never do learn. :) And yes, the promo was very spoilery. I watched it in a moment of bad judgement. Dean with the gun, saying 'You should have looked for me'.

Aside from ALL THAT the thing I love MORE THAN ANYTHING is that the show is still all about THEM. It remembered ALL THAT STUFF from the past. (I know it SHOULD, but for it to actually do that was nothing short of fabulous!). As soon as Sam mentioned Amy I was like... holy crap. They are tying in past story lines. THANK YOU!

When that first came up, I was bemused, because what Dean says about Benny is exactly what he said about Amy - with some people you just can't, even if you really should, and someone should to do it for you. That's completely consistent, and Sam would know that. But then Dean started wailing about Sam abandoning him to spend time with Samuel and not telling him he had no soul, and I realised this was the mutual argument of 'I don't care whether I'm making sense, the point is that you're not supposed to spend time with people who aren't me', and then the whole thing made much more sense. So that was good. :)

I LOVE GARTH TO PIECES! What a fabulously quirky, grounded, smart and charming character. (I NEED to vid that guy!) I have a crush I'm sure!

I have mixed feeling about Garth. I agree with this about 90 per cent of the time. I like that he's bright and occasionally naive and generally gets by on his wits. I like variety in my hunters. I also like that we're essentially seeing Bobby before he was Bobby - it takes time to teach yourself all those languages and develop gravitas. Give Garth 20 years and he'll be there. But sometimes the humour they give the character makes me cringe. I'm nodding along happily with his arguments, and then they do that gag where he tries saying 'idiot' the way Bobby did, and I just want to crawl under my desk and stick my fingers in my ears, because no. That's not funny, that's awkward and inappropriate.

That said, I'm not sure that's an actual criticism as much as a problem with my sense of humour. I can't watch most of The Real Ghostbusters either, for the same reason.

(I think I still want more from Sam's back story and the flash back transitions were jarring)

Oh, yes. That was ... unfortunate. My response to the flashbacks themselves would be 'Oh, Sam', but then we'd go back to the present and Sam would pull this face. Something like: 'Huh. I zoned out for about four minutes there. Amazing I didn't get hit by a bus. Oh, well, back to it.' I'm not sure I was supposed to be giggling at those transitions.

But with Sam ... I'm mostly waiting for the stuff that I couldn't work out for myself. I mean, all this stuff is necessary, because some of the early spoilers were worrying, and even if we take it as a given that Sam was distraught they still have to show it as groundwork. But still, it's all fairly straightforward and I don't find myself surprised by what I'm seeing. But there are mysteries lurking in there somewhere. I just hope they get to some of them soon. :)
8th-Nov-2012 02:02 pm (UTC)
I've seen both reactions around (Sam is evil! No Dean is evil!), and I just have to laugh.

I've just made an edit to the post because I've seen the same thing. It's as though these guys should be making sense. The fact that they aren't is the whole point. And in fact, if fandom is ranting about what Dean said and what Sam did then the episode worked. It was all about how at odds they are with each other (and therefore have that road to travel).

I equally don't get it because when the boys are in tune with each other (aka S7) there's nothing but complaints about the season being "bro-less". *shrugs* I don't care. I had feels and therefore show still matters to me. The day I watch an ep like that and think..."whatever"...I know I'm past it - time to move on. (I'm SO not passed it!)

I'm am so glad I didn't watch the promo. I liked that I didn't know who was going to be possessed (though I figured Dean was the obvious choice).

And hee.. you'd think these darling boys would know if the monster they are going after is going to "reveal" something about them they would run a mile. (I'm glad they don't know they are in a TV show. *g*)

Re Garth. I think I was along for the ride. I think because the "idjit" line had a bookend... the first time it was cringe worthy and inappropriate and at the end it offered more poignancy so I went with it. I may end up being the only Garth fan but I really needed his POV of things. It WAS wrong and I think that's totally Garth. There's this mix of him have NO idea with him have a totally complete idea. (Hee...crushing much...)

Yikes... the flashback transitions were totally soap opera clunky. Talk about signaling. I blame the editor. And the director. The audience are smarter than that. We know about flashbacks - just get to it. Also... I'm not sure the flashback gave me any more information about Sam or Amelia. I figured she had issues and we know Sam's. I would have liked more of a surprise there. I didn't mind the "don't pity me" thing but yeah...it's the one thing I was less squeeful about.

I think I really hope there are still mysteries lurking there. But I have to say I think they aren't going to go there. I expected some "omg Dean...I tried to make a deal and I even drank blood" in that ep but I actually think they are honestly going with "I couldn't cope, I didn't have anyone, I didn't know where you were, I was lost so I moved on" story line. It's hard but maybe we have to accept that Sam CAN live without Dean. (arghh...did I just say that?!!)

Awesome thinky episode.
xx

8th-Nov-2012 01:40 pm (UTC)
No time for a coherent response, but just wanted to say: YES. THIS. ALLLLLLLLL OF THIS.
8th-Nov-2012 02:48 pm (UTC)
WOOT! Coherence is overrated anyway! :DD
8th-Nov-2012 02:28 pm (UTC)
*FLAILS HERSELF INTO LOW-EARTH ORBIT*
8th-Nov-2012 02:49 pm (UTC)
*JOINS YOU*
8th-Nov-2012 02:43 pm (UTC)
Yay, completely agree! I especially love this - "That episode felt like part of the whole Supernatural universe. It remembered past characters and story arcs. It tapped into the angst of the brothers, it used the MotW to explore their issues, it had a supporting character that had his own agenda but also provided levity. It was one for die hard watchers like me - the ones who live these PURE brother episodes."
8th-Nov-2012 03:41 pm (UTC)
Yay! Brother episodes for the win! \o/
8th-Nov-2012 02:54 pm (UTC)
As long as it's about their messed up co-dependence I'm cool.

YES! THIS EXACTLY! It's not Supernatural without a healthy dose of messed up co-dependency! Funnily enough that is totally the subject of my next SPN vid :)

But I really like that "remember" Bobby bit. We spend so much time wrapped up in Sam and Dean's head that it was a nice little reminder of the outside world.
8th-Nov-2012 03:43 pm (UTC)
Funnily enough that is totally the subject of my next SPN vid :)

Oh yay! I've been working on this wincesty vid also.. though it's more of the schmoopy variety. ;)

And yeah... so nice that they bring Bobby back as a "memory" and that he exists outside of Sam and Dean. :))
8th-Nov-2012 03:20 pm (UTC)
Peeking, just peeking, but again, was looking to see whether the episode was Ash-squee-worthy... ;)

(Loved last week's episode!)
8th-Nov-2012 03:29 pm (UTC)
OMG Deb.... so many friggin' feelings it ain't funny. It's very VERY hurty though - it's like ripping off a plaster and having to deal with all those festering owies. But it's also a relief that it's out in the open. LOVE IT!

8th-Nov-2012 03:28 pm (UTC)
Totally on board with you about Garth. Loved how he stood up to Dean during the researching scene (Bobby didn't just belong to him and Sam) and how Dean backed down.

What I really want is for Sam and Dean to have an honest conversation...I get that they are hurting, I get that neither one knows how to communicate...but honestly, after 8 years I would like to see some ability to own what they are feeling...
8th-Nov-2012 03:40 pm (UTC)
Yeah.. Garth is made of win. I love that he can see what the boys can't. :)

And (probably unfortunately or, er fortunately...) the boys just can't get that conversation happening. If they were actually able to have that conversation then there would be no where to go. I always come back to that. The fact that they can't have an honest conversation speaks volumes about them and who they are and what they mean to each other. They constantly protect each other and themselves. That honest conversation would mean Dean saying...I need you. I need you to worry about me and look for me. I need to matter to you. And Dean just can't say that. He doesn't want Sam to have to deal with that OR have to admit to himself that he wants that.

Ack! I sprouted all those things I didn't mention in the post. Their inability to actually say it as it is is part of the whole drama.
8th-Nov-2012 04:13 pm (UTC)
Yay!! It WAS an awesome episode! I loved all the Sam and Dean moments! And I was so happy when Sam and then later Dean brought up past storylines!
9th-Nov-2012 04:37 am (UTC)
Wasn't it just?! So much SamnDean stuff. It do love it when they refer to the past. I know we (as fans) remember all that stuff, but it's great when the writers do to.

:)
8th-Nov-2012 04:24 pm (UTC)
Heh. I love everything about this review. EVERYTHING.

That episode felt like part of the whole Supernatural universe. It remembered past characters and story arcs. It tapped into the angst of the brothers, it used the MotW to explore their issues, it had a supporting character that had his own agenda but also provided levity. It was one for die hard watchers like me - the ones who live these PURE brother episodes.

I am just LOVING how this season's MOTWs keep circling back to brotherly issues, just loving it. It's genius -- bravo, Carver! (And you were definitely the first person on my flist to pick up on the MOTW link and point it out to the rest of us, so yay, you!)

. . . and yeah, the very SECOND their research mentioned "brothers" and "betrayal issues," I just knew it'd be Dean taken for a ride by the spectre.

Sam is OBVIOUSLY feeling guilty about his response to not looking for Dean and he's trying to DEAL with that and Dean is OBVIOUSLY still carrying some deep seated acceptance issues.

And because they're Winchesters, it's gonna be a good long while before stuff gets laid out on the table. A good, long, angsty while. ;)

Brilliant analysis, bb!
9th-Nov-2012 04:58 am (UTC)
Thanks honey!

The MotW's are so at the moment. I mean, the show used to work on this level ages ago (Asylum comes to mind particularly - especially as it used the same method of getting Sam to say what's really him his mind), so it's great to see them using this again.

And yeah..."betrayal" was a real give away wasn't it. I was getting SO excited to see that play out.

And yep! Winchesters will mean getting all messy before the sort it all out. But when it's sorted out....YAY! that'll be awesome too.

<333
8th-Nov-2012 04:35 pm (UTC)
YES! I agree with every single thing you said. I wish we'd been watching it together!!!!! I'll be back to say more later, but for now, YES. Messed up boys, real emotion, continuity across effin' SEASONS, boys so jealous over each other, all of it, YES :)
9th-Nov-2012 05:01 am (UTC)
WOOT!!

it would have been an amazing ep to watch with like minded fangirls. I desperately need to *cling* to someone!

Their jealously is a thing to behold. They seriously can't let the other have anyone else (which is seriously awesome!) <33
8th-Nov-2012 05:38 pm (UTC)
Gotta run as hubby and I are flying off to San Francisco in a few hours to celebrate our 25th wedding anniversary!

But had to comment. I was surprised there was so much radio silence after last night's ep. I would have thought there would have been more.

I very definitely saw the "the boys are couple" aspects throughout this whole episode with the fights and the jealousy and the bitterness. There was definitely an old married couple feel to them. And I think you nailed it with the "boys are MESSED UP" statements.

This morning I woke up and started thinking about the woman (Beverly Tanner, will never be able to separate her from that role), killing her long-time husband. And it really wasn't over anything. When it happened at the beginning of the show there was an implication that the guy had cheated on her and she had just found out. So while it was still tragic, it was at least "understandable." But knowing that it was just the spectra feeding off a very, very old and basically inconsequential moment in their history - makes it VERY tragic.

It's not like I'm not focused on long-term relationships/marriages today. lol. :)

So glad to see your post overall. Perhaps during downtimes in SF I may post something myself.

9th-Nov-2012 12:23 pm (UTC)
Yay 25 years! Congratulations!! Hubby and I celebrated our 20th this year. :) It's a nice feeling isn't it? *g*

And speaking of being married those boys definitely are. And not with in any 'cesty way. They are just so joined at the hip. Such a "couple".

And the woman killing her long time husband is SO sad. It's interesting to me that the episode was about the way we have these feelings (be them jealousy, bitterness, loss of trust etc.) but we keep them under control. And that's ok... probably good. We have to sometimes put them aside to be able to get on things. That spectra really was a nasty thing to be able to dig those up and feed on them. I loved that Garth really didn't have anything he's holding on to.

Have fun in SF! And again... CONGRATS! :D
8th-Nov-2012 07:18 pm (UTC)
Wasn't this episode just FABULOUS?!!! ♥ :D \o/

*twirls you happily*

9th-Nov-2012 12:23 pm (UTC)
It was indeed BB!! I was so involved and, quite literally, on the edge of my seat. <33
8th-Nov-2012 07:22 pm (UTC)
It's official - I am totally crushing on you.

Pretty much yes to everything here. :) They are so married this season - like a couple who has been married for years and I'm loving it! I also adore that every couple we've seen is a parallel to S/D - even Amelia/husband is Sam/Dean. *grins* I also like that Dean's little truth telling in this ep. paralleled Sam's truth telling where he shot Dean in the early seasons.

They are so messed up and messed up about each other which is what I love about show. :)

And you should totally do Garth vid - he was so wonderful in this ep.

ETA: I'm just going to live in your journal - clearly this is where my fandom peeps are.

Edited at 2012-11-08 07:35 pm (UTC)
9th-Nov-2012 12:28 pm (UTC)
\o/ :DD

I also like that Dean's little truth telling in this ep. paralleled Sam's truth telling where he shot Dean in the early seasons.

YES YES! It was such a great parallel. The only way these boys can actually express how they really feel is when they are possessed. Hee... they really should start to sort that out (or run miles from ghosts who feed of of negative emotions..;D)

I'm just going to live in your journal - clearly this is where my fandom peeps are.

Woot!
xox
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